“Sunday Tea” // Chit-Chat: I've Cried A Thousand Times
Why do we cry? What is the trigger? I don’t mean the obvious things like death and devastation. I mean those not so subtle reasons why someone is moved to tears. Crying has always had this negative stigma attached to it … but why? I’ve shed tears of joy and happiness when my daughter graduated from high school and college + or the first time I saw her in a show. It moved me + it brought me to tears because she came from me + and she is this incredible person … I have this proud and wonderful feeling + which sometimes is overwhelming. I’ve shed tears during certain movies not because they are sad or heartbreaking but because there’s something in that movie that I’m relating to … something in the context that gives me hope and perspective about my life.
This may sound silly but I feel a great release when I cry. When things in life come to a head and I feel like I’m going to explode + I cry. I’m feeling so many emotions from happy + to pissed + or just miserable. Do we cry alone [that’s mostly me] or do we need others to help us work through our shit. I’m usually looking for some answers or truth + so I’m having a conversation with God + and I always find myself asking why me + how did I get to this point + or how to do I come out of this. While catching up on my shows this week I watched Grey’s Anatomy and I pulled this quote.
“Uh, girl, have you even read the Old Testament? Most of the people in there follow God’s rules and still suffer. Faith when things are good is easy, faith during times of hardship is real.” — Grey’s Anatomy | Season 14 – Episode 17, 86,400 Seconds” [source: Vulture]
I don’t love any less because I’ve been hurt + nor can I curl up in a ball because I’ve suffered. I love faster + I feel deeper … I love better. I know that life is pain and if it were easy it wouldn’t be called life + so there are things I’m willing to accept. I’m not afraid to love even though I know it can bring me hurt on many levels. I’m willing to spare those tears for those awkward + vulnerable moments. I’ve shared some of the best moments with “B” through laughter and tears. Does it make me a weak person + can we blame this on a female trait + I don’t know … maybe I will never know + and maybe I will never have all the answers. I refuse to wallow in the doubt of not knowing. What I do know is that through faith I can conquer all things + and through tears I am stronger + I am better + and I am loved.
Thank you so much for hanging with me on the blog on this Sunday. Don’t forget to “comment” + “like” + and “subscribe”. Have a fantastic week friends…