Have you ever wanted someone else to just “take the wheel” just for a little while. Yes that is the feeling …. you want to let someone else do the driving + or make the decisions so you can close your eyes and just not have to worry about everything all the time. Yes … we know life is hard + if it wasn’t hard it wouldn’t be called life + but sometimes I just want a little intervention…a little needed assistance can go a long way. I want my own all-knowing “Oracle” (Matrix) to guide me or show me my path.
“Because you didn’t come here to make the choice. You’ve already made it. You’re here to try to understand why you made it. I thought you’d have figured that out by now.” (Oracle, Reloaded – WikiQuote)
I feel like for the past 33 or so years (I don’t count my adolescent stage) that I’ve been winging it. Just riding by the seat of pants or that “I sure hope this works” or “Keeping my fingers crossed”, or “God willing”. Sometimes I just shake my head + I wish things could be that easy and having someone guide you. Life’s major decisions are processed in the back of my brain before I even utter a word or give it too much thought. We know right from wrong or the things that we shouldn’t do (as adults) … like I don’t need to spend $150 on those boots because I shouldn’t be shopping + I should be snowballing that money to pay down my credit cards + or saving it for a “real” vacation and not a stay-cation. When your single all decisions are made unilaterally + because you only have to worry about yourself and or the consequences + when you have children nothing is for yourself + but for the future of your family…you sacrifice + which is fine (I get that) but sometimes I wish that someone would have told me what to expect. This is where parents come into play. Maybe your parents or respective guardians did try to tell you + and you just didn’t listen. That’s probably the category I would fall into + I didn’t want to listen to anyone because I assumed that no one understood what I was going through …. and so + I don’t have to listen to anyone because I got this…”I got the wheel”. So … would an all-knowing Oracle have helped my destiny + would I have even paid attention + or did I already have an Oracle figure in my life but didn’t give them the credit that they deserved. It’s a head scratcher and one I ponder often. (My alternate reality) I guess what I’m getting folks is that … we all want to be better human beings and everything we deal with in this life guides us towards those goals. I don’t want to know everything there is to know because learning + striving + and reaching is the actual lesson. The steps you took to get where you are in life + are the fundamentals or your life lessons.
Since it is Sunday + it should be a day of rest. My day of rest started with cleaning the litter boxes + emptying the dishwasher + wiping down my blinds and windowsill + and lots of vacuuming. I could stare at the wall for most of the afternoon and not feel bad about a thing. In my head I know my body needs this recharge + this rest + this peace. Contrary to popular belief rest is one of the best things you can do for your body + and when I say rest I don’t mean sleep. To be still + to be at peace + to just not move is giving your body and brain exactly what it needs. I know that there are plenty of things I could be doing now + and I’m already doing one of them by being here and posting + but lounging on the sofa listening to some jazz + and just sipping something hot on this rainy day sounds like a plan. My daughter calls our sofa “The Sunken Place” (Get Out) + because once your on our sofa everything you need to do gets further and further away + you relax and melt into it. You want to get up from it + but it’s like your body is cement + and you just can’t focus….we always laugh about it because I’ll leave her on the couch and say something like + “your going to bed right”…and then an hour later she’s still there dozing on the couch and unable to move….(The Sunken Place)…so no doubt this were I’ll be spending the rest of my Sunday afternoon..mostly.
Thanks so much for visiting my blog today + and I would like to thank each and every person that takes the time to read my rambles … I hope everyone has a fantastic week. Don’t forget to “like” + “follow” + and “subscribe” so you can stay up to date on all of my post.